Jane Winter of Church in Society reflects on her attendance at a conference exploring Spirituality in the 3rd Age
The message came loud and clear –
‘Older people contribute depth and richness to local communities'
Saturday 1 st November 2004 saw 160 people exploring Spirituality in the 3 rd Age - a conference convened by Church in Society in Canterbury and Rochester dioceses, the Spirituality Group in Canterbury diocese and Methodist Homes for the Aged Care Group (MHA), at Christ Church High School , Ashford.
Keynote speakers Rev. Dr. Keith Albans (MHA) and Rev. Andrew Cunningham Parish Priest of Midhurst, emphasised the importance of listening, building relationships and recognising the wide gifts older people offer.
Ageing is no accident. It is a necessary part of the journey, We need to discover imaginative ways to unlock the intelligence and respect it deserves. We do that through recognising potential and growth, acknowledging experience and wisdom, and affirming the commitment and dedication of older people. This moves us from a culture treating old age as a time of disintegration and shut down, to one of self worth, a harvest of the rich fruits of a lifetime's experience.
Our story, emphasised Andrew, shapes who we are. Stories change. Change is frightening, making us vulnerable and all the more so as we get old and frail. Keith emphasised this point highlighting the fear of loss in retirement, loss of friends, family, home, the ability of our bodies to see, hear, move and the loss of our mind to communicate and express our deepest self. What is the role of the church? Andrew stressed the need for finding time, often silent time just to be - to explore faith, not to provide answers. To be surprised by the activity of God and to be served by Christ found in older people, recognising ‘the Holy Spirit coursing through their veins'. He quoted the example of Zechariah ‘How can this be for I am an old man?'
Elaine Allen demonstrated this contribution through the work of the Methodist Homes for the Aged. The Charity provide extensive resources for churches and particular reference was made to the Community Service Tool Kit, the Diamond Jubilee pack and the prayer book, all available through www.mha.org.uk , or email enquiries@mha.org.uk
The workshop sessions focused on spiritual needs around dementia, bereavement, residential care, parish pastoral care, our own journey and the end of life. There was energy, desire and a need to know more in order for people to engage with informed understanding in the changes and chances that grace and shadow older age. People expressed real fear about the unknown and ‘getting it wrong'. The Church, we noted, wasn't good at being vulnerable!
We need to learn how to be angry and sad with God alongside others sharing grief, loss and bereavement. We recognised the huge potential of working with care providers and that linking up resources locally was ‘do-able'.
The day was punctuated by much laughter and cleansed with tears reflecting deep love and care for ageing communities. We acknowledged the responsibility to retain dignity in a time of loss because ageing is part of the God's creative process. This was expressed in the welcome of finding new friends and companionship discovered in shared experiences in workshops or over the super lunch provided by members of Otham Church .
It was a great day, but where do we go from here? Back to our parish settings to work out our response, noting the wide range of resources and support provided by Church in Society and others. The day ended with worship and the reminder of God's love demonstrated in older people.
‘I see Christ in all their faces, every single one'
© 2005 Jane Winter & Newsline